The other day, as I embarked on a new treadmill exercise regimen, I decided to take advantage of an Internet service called Pandora that claims to provide streaming music based on my musical preferences. My idea was to ask Pandora to play classic rock songs with driving drum beats that could act as a metronome to my walking pace and give me that extra incentive to push through the monotony of a treadmill workout. It’s the same principle used on slave ships in old Hollywood movies where the menacing shirtless guy pounds on a kettle drum to give the galley slaves a rhythmic beat to coordinate the rowing of those giant oars.

Interesting how exercise and slave labor can have so much in common, don’t you think?

The problem with using a music service like Pandora, however, is that I couldn’t control the pace of the songs it selected for me. The first few rock songs it played did not provide a musical rhythm that matched my stride, and it threw my body off-balance. It wasn’t until the fourth song that I finally heard a perfect beat to coincide with my steps.

As the song started its instrumental introduction, I thought, YES! Now we’re talking! Fast drum beat… catchy guitar riff… NOW I can work up a good sweat!

Then the lead singer began screaming out the lyrics and I realized I was going to hell…

“Living easy, living free
Season ticket on a one-way ride
Asking nothing, leave me be
Taking everything in my stride
Don’t need reason, don’t need rhyme
Ain’t nothing I would rather do
Going down, party time
My friends are gonna be there, too…

I’m on a Highway to Hell!”

Dude. My perfect walking song turned out to be “Highway to Hell” by AC/DC. Can you say, awkward? Needless to say, I quickly took the Highway to Hell off-ramp and fled to the nearest roadside restroom to wash out my ears with soap.

Good. Grief.

It was then that I realized that Christians like myself shouldn’t be using randomly-selected rock songs to enhance our exercise routines, especially when it carries the possible risk of compromising our faith and theological principles. It was obvious that I had made the all-too-common mistake of relying on a worldly solution to my problem without ever considering the substantial collection of worship music that has served the Church for hundreds and hundreds of years.

Why not play the old hymns during my workout? I asked myself. This is a much wiser choice than relying on popular music and its worldly content. Who needs Olivia Newton-John when we have John Newton? Who needs Sean “P. Diddy” Combs when we have Isaac “Psalm Diddy” Watts? Who needs Lady Gaga when we have Augustus Toplady?  Who needs Marilyn Manson when we have ear plugs?

Surely these great songwriters of the faith are far superior to our supposed “American idols.” Plus, I’m sure our Christian artists of old wouldn’t mind if we used their hymns for pumping iron or doing Pilates. After all, worship music shouldn’t be restricted to just Sunday mornings in the pew; it should be practiced throughout the week to help us fix our eyes on Jesus Christ no matter what we are doing.

After going through the impressive catalog of hymns on The Cyber Hymnal, I was pleasantly surprised to find several songs to inspire both my body and my faith during times of exercise. The reconstituted Psalms of Isaac Watts, the poetic gems of Charles Wesley, and the Olney Hymns of John Newton and William Cowper all provide a great resource for any Christian who desires to be a good steward with his physical gifts. This isn’t to say, of course, that there isn’t new Christian music being produced today that is engaging and rich in biblical truth, but I decided to focus first on the timeless music of our heritage. Eventually I zeroed in on the marching-tempo hymns like “Onward Christian Soldier” and “Victory in Jesus” to give me a perfect blend of rhythm and gospel themes to enhance my treadmill workouts without putting me back on the road to hell.

In fact, over time, I was able to compile a long list of suitable hymns to be used by Christians when they engage in healthy activities like dieting and exercise. Here is just a short sampling for your edification:

• For the warm-up: “Father, I Stretch My Hands to Thee.”
• For deep knee bends: “Stand Up, Stand Up for Jesus.”
• For sit-ups: “Sit Up, Sit Up for Jesus.” (Okay, I made that one up.)
• After pulling a muscle: “Lift the Strain of High Thanksgiving.”
• For sore muscles afterwards: “There is a Balm in Gilead.”
• For low-fat dieting: “How Tedious and Tasteless.”
• For high-fiber dieting: “Blest is the Man Whose Bowels Move.”
• For the weigh-in at the bathroom scale: “And Can It Be That I Should Gain?”
• For when you go back to the La-Z-Boy in front of your TV: “I Have Found a Precious Resting Place.”

Of course, some of you Christians out there have given up on trying to get into better shape and you just want to eat a double cheeseburger to God’s glory. In that case, let me recommend the following hymn to help you on your way:

“Just As I Am.”