39 Comments For This Post

1. John Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 2:17 am

   Chopped down by a roundhouse kick. Love it.
   This sells much better than the Obama Koran (at least everywhere but California).

2. Joanna Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 6:14 am

   The surprising thing about this is that they haven’t done a chuck norris bible so far. It wouldn’t surprise me if it happens. There is patriotic bibles already.

3. Jim Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 7:27 am

   Yes sir, & here in Canada we’ve got the Pierre Trudeau edition. Maybe not so colourful as it’s only red and white, but okay, “eh” it’s just as partiotic! Mais oui!

4. Brad Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 8:28 am

   Wonder if I can get mine autographed?

5. Matt Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 9:18 am

   Yeah, I can only assume this is due to the release of The Patriotic Bible that was recently released? Why have study notes that exposit the text when you can just load them up with patriotic sentimentalism. After all, it’s the USA that took Israel’s place, not the Bride of Christ, right?

6. Steve Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 11:04 am

   I am not a fan of the recently released patriotic Bible, but is that really any worse than the Green Bible??

7. Matt Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 11:09 am

   Steve - I don’t think it’s any worse than the Green Bible (or the TNIV for that matter). The problem is that it’s not any better, either. Both force an ideology onto the Scriptures rather than glean one out of it. My $0.02.

8. brent Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 11:45 am

   I would like to know this one thing:
   Is this ad real?
   No jokes, just the truth please.

9. brian Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 12:09 pm

   Scary stuff…

10. Angus Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 12:50 pm

    It could be a real ad, but it’s not.

11. Mark | hereiblog Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 12:52 pm

    Could this also be called the “Prime Chuck Bible”?

    

12. Dennis Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 12:56 pm

    Praise the Lord and pass the ammo!

13. steffsings Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 1:02 pm

    What’s next? The CookBookBible - lots of great recipes for life? Wait… Don’t anyone steal my idea, I’m starting on it today: leats see… the ‘Red Sea-food bisque’ ‘Mount Moriah Minestrone Soup….” mmmmm-mm good reading!

14. Waylon Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 1:23 pm

    “For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God that brings salvation; first to Texans, then to the rest y’all.” (CNB)

15. John Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    Don’t forget the Nancy Pelosi Bible, on the last page there is a complete denial of everything that was just printed.

16. T. Tex Tommy Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 3:00 pm

    Well I’ll-be Angus. Ya done got me all worked up. This may be the greatest thang I seen since…well, I dunno what.

    Most Bibles these days are just plain plug-ugly. But that there thing is purty. And it’s good that it’s in the King’s English too cause you can put your boots in the oven, but that don’t make em biscuits, if you know what I mean.

    Now, if they would only release the “Walker, Texas Ranger Sunday School” video series, I’d be fixin to spend more money than a galoot in a Stetson store.

    Well, like the youngins say, Peace Out. What I’m trying to say is, we’ve howdied but we ain’t shook yet.

17. Steve Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    That’s the toughest Bible I’ve ever seen! I think I just saw an TNIV running for dear life.

18. Eddie Eddings Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 4:41 pm

    If this isn’t a real ad…then why did the Ammo shop take my thirty five dollars and order me a copy?
    BTW…I hear the Chuck Norris Stars and Stripes Translation renames the Levites, Bruce Leevites. Is this true?

19. Matt Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 6:15 pm

    Is the CNB a Democrat-neutral translation? Or does that await the TCNB?

    I’d like to see the CNB arm-wrestle The Message.

20. Nabal Ben-Nimrod Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 7:01 pm

    I’m an Iraq war veteran, and I support this message. (No, no, no THAT message)

21. Carol Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    Now this will be the door prize given this coming Sunday at the “All American Tough Guy Worship Center”…for every new guy coming to worship with Chuck, they get a free copy….this comes along with the all American cup of coffee and donuts…and if ya think they will have to pry the BIble out of his cold dead hands, try taking his donuts!

22. Joe Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 7:34 pm

    Carol, how did I know that you would make an observation on the apostate seeker friendly megachurchs of America?

23. John Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 8:13 pm

    When Rob Bell saw this Bible he spilled herbal tea all over the interior of his Prias.

24. Joe Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 8:35 pm

    Whats a “prias”? And what’s Rob doing looking at a bible?

25. John Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 9:58 pm

    Joe, Chuck would be proud that you are unfamiliar with the Prias, you just won yourself an autographed CNB my friend.

26. Joe Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 10:01 pm

    Ok, I need to apologize for the above comment, God has been showing me recently that I need to quit making snide remarks about those we consider abberant in their beliefs. There is a place to confront heretics and false teachers, but my comments are often made out of spite and not concern for the truth. I’m not against satire to make a point, but I’ll leave it to the pros

    PS- I’m not apologizing for the prias comment though

27. Joe Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 10:02 pm

    Autographed with his boot print?!?!?

28. Dominic Stockford Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 2:06 am

    And there was me thinking that it was the British who are the lost tribe of Israel…

29. Les Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 8:37 am

    I got me one…. now if can just find my blood red highligher pen. It would be a better Bible if it had just one big white star instead of all those little ones.

30. kevin Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 8:52 am

    Here’s a link to the “American Patriot Bible” *sigh

31. LuLu Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 9:36 am

    The next edition of the “CNB” is going to play “Proud To Be An American” everytime you open it.(It might quickly become a forgotten tune…)

32. The Reformed Methodist Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 9:53 am

    The public should be much more accepting of this than they were of the “Alec Baldwin Reference Bible, featuring the Apocrypha”

33. The Aspiring Theologian Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 11:01 am

    I know this isn’t true. Chuck Norris doesn’t read the Bible.

    He has the whole thing memorized.

    In the original Greek and Hebrew.

34. Kristin Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 11:23 am

    I have to wonder if this is the version Todd Bentley has been using for his inspirations to “leg drop” people?

35. Steve Says:
    July 15th, 2009 at 1:43 pm

    According the packaging: “Notice: Do not attempt to use a Bible cover for this Bible. The Chuck Norris Bible doesn’t need any additional protection.”

36. Carol Says:
    July 16th, 2009 at 5:31 pm

    There will be people actually looking for this on Amazon.com!

37. Gaynell Harbin Says:
    July 20th, 2009 at 7:50 am

    Dear Chuck,
    I am so proud of the stand you are taking. God is with you. Many of us are counting on you to stand strong. These birds who are talking couldn’t even do a push up. The heat you are taking is the real heat. They are trying to break you but that is where you see what you are made of. With God you can do anything.We will be praying and remember their are 10,000 of us in the city.
    The Bible was what this country was founded on. It shows the American way. That was a good idea. Thanks for being a great American.
    Yours in the battle,
    Gaynell Harbin

38. Souldr Says:
    September 20th, 2009 at 2:19 am

    There is a scripture that says; “Jesting is not conveniant” so people, please be careful when you slander a brother in the Lord as again the Word of God says; ” you will have to give an account for every idle word spoken”

39. Robert Says:
    November 9th, 2009 at 7:35 pm

    il buy it only if chuck sings the theme song,yepikhiya

3 Trackbacks For This Post

1. Chuck Norris Bible « Sola Dei Gloria Says:
   July 14th, 2009 at 1:27 pm

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